A Frog Story

 Yesterday at 10:53pm 

This was supposed to be a Homework assignment on 5 min. in your life that was significant. My mind was blank and It was a night the lent itself to scary stories so this is the story of a significant 5 minutes.


A Frog Story by R. L Simpson 03/20/20ten .


I was closing up the gym. Well I was locking up –everyone had gone at closing time –I locked the doors and decided to do my workout routine Legs and arms and stretches and cardio Though Lord knows I did enough cardio just cleaning the bathrooms. We moved from a small gym in a busy shopping center where we parked in front. To a new gym four times the size and 4 extra bathrooms and urinals –(urinals are just weird). Extra shower stalls with no privacy and lots and lots of gym equipment. It was a pain to clean.


Anyway we now park in the back by the entrance, hidden from the busy street in front. It is a big back parking lot, Storage Units on one side and little kids dance studio on the other side. Tall security lights on timers that echoed the hours the businesses were opened. Behind us was a swamp or ‘environmentally friendly drainage; and Frogs sung a very loud chorus every night. I loved their songs.


By the time I left the gym, it was so foggy I could not see my hands in front of me. Security Lights were off. In fact I did a Three Stooges Eye Poke and missed my one eye and hit the other eye, with the wrong finger. I winced and laughed. Mostly to hear noise because the frogs were quiet and it felt like what I would hope an enchanted evening would feel like. Magical. I couldn’t find my car so I pressed the lock on my keys and could hear the beep sound but could not see the lights. Great, I thought, this would be a fun drive home.


I literally bumped into the back of my car. The alarm sound had echoed off to my right, the car was to my left. I hand walked slowly, along the side of the car to my door, opened only the driver’s door and got in. I locked the doors and rolled up all the windows, before I started the car. As the engine started, I looked down at the odometer reading –it was 7777.7 . WOW how cool it that –LUCKY 7’s! maybe I will stop at the grocery store and buy a Lottery ticket because it is to far and foggy to go to Atlantic City tonight.




I backed the car out and drove slowly out of the lot. I should have realized something was wrong when I didn’t hear the first speed bump, but I was so excited about seeing all lucky 7’s . I never heard the second speed bump either and my car speed increased.


I must have done a little air over the end of the lot, because I realized I had gone the wrong way in the parking lot, as my all wheel drive SUV started to sink into the environmentally friendly deep drainage swamp..




OH man, I thought, How am I going to get myself out of this one. It was 2 hours after closing. I was not on the schedule to work for 2 weeks. I lived alone, no one would even start looking for me for days. Of all the times to forget my cell phone.


I looked up and there on the window of my closed Moon Roof is the biggest frog I have ever seen. He is not singing. He is however moving his mouth. “WOW , A talking frog”, I think to myself.
I still have engine power but the car is sinking fast, I open the moon roof.


The frog yells down. “R U Nuts? -Cars aren’t allowed in the swamp”. The frog has an Old English accent.


I yell back “I am dead, right?’


Frog says: “No Princess. but when you get the bill for this little wrong turn , your gonna wish you were.”


“What do I do?” Oh dear, I am asking a talking frog with an English accent what to do. And I started to cry. Now I NEVER cry –well mostly never and never in front of people> or ah> Frogs


" Ok Drama Queen –Is it my turn to talk now? My friends and I can help but it will cost you." says the Frog


"What?" said I.


Frog: (yelling louder) "IT WILL COST YOU"


The car has now sunk to the window tops. I should have tried to get out earlier. I need to close the moon roof or try to crawl out quick. The opening is small and I am large –but I have nothing to loose. I did have lucky 7’s.today, right? I unbuckle my seat belt and start to stand.


"You will never make it thru the swamp without my help" says the English frog.


"Ok so help me". (Am I still talking to a frog? Did I hit my head?)


"The cost for help will be a kiss." the Frog drools " Do you accept?"


"What?" I said stalling for divine intervention.


"It will cost you A Kiss". he repeats with smirkie frogness


"Oh ok" I say with defeat," but no tongue."


He drawls himself up; indignant and says:" I am an English Frog NOT a French Frog."


I Grimaced and stuck my head out the moon roof.
He LIED !
The Frog planted one sloppy tongue french Kiss on me.
Jeeze, My arms and legs and pocketbook were still in the car.


Apparently English frogs like tongue kisses like most Males.


POOF !


Well to make a long story short. : All frogs can talk if they want to, Frogs don’t have lucky numbers and some males have magical tongues,


AND


I hopped right out of that car and joined in the chorus.


I just love frog songs.

Wanda's Husband

I belong to a Creative Writing Group -this was a recent story of growing old /the assignment was to write a story for AARP or an ageing population ;but it turned out a little depressing ........I never know until the end where a story will go:

He went into the hospital complaining of his toes. They hurt. They were turning black. The Doctors ordered a test. Results showed a funny blockage in his groin. It was causing the blood to flow somewhere other than his toes. So they operated. Guess what?  The old man was really hurting and this did the trick –pink piggy toes. Everyone was Happy, especially his 85 year old wife. His long suffering wife to this brilliant, devout Episcopalian, cruel alcoholic, mentally abusive misogynist.

But in his good days –ah those good days –he was deserving of God’s Grace and Wanda’s love.

Two weeks later he is taken back to the hospital in pain. They do another procedure thru the femoral artery to see if another blockage has occurred or can they widen his 85 year old veins to help the blood flow. Nothing was accomplished. They sent him home.  Unfortunately, he was hallucinating and it wasn’t the confusion of the anesthesia. It was a weird reaction to the pain medicine. His 85 year old wife was not able to talk with the Doctor since he was released to his #2 son. Getting him into the house he collapsed on the #2 son and cut his finger. #3 son finally arrives. Together get him into the house. It was chaos and bloody.

In the middle of the night he is awake on the phone with a telephone supervisor trying to get her to tell him where these people are holding him, he doesn’t know his bride and calls her the ‘face’. She calls the #2 son in the middle of the night and he drives the 20 min. back to their house. He talks sweet to him and gets some calm response. But the ‘face’ can no longer be within his sight. #3 son takes the next shift and reads out loud from a condensed story. The old man dozes. They have to watch him –two days and he is still hallucinating. They get him to use the urinal. He puts in his finger and pees on the floor. The old woman will have to clean it up but maybe she can finally get rid of the rug in that room. She laughs.

The discharge, follow up nurse calls from the hospital to see how he is doing. The old woman tells her and the nurse says; oh he must be having a reaction you should have brought him back. The old woman screams inside her head –Why did you send him home so soon?. The nurse continues to talk; this doesn’t happen with same day procedures. The old woman is tired. Her sons have heard the verbal abuse he has heaped on her for years and are in denial, blaming the vitriol tirade on the medicine. #1 son calls and the old Lady asked him to take turns with his brothers.

On a long distance phone call to the daughter of her heart, the old Lady says she is grateful to her sons The old man actually was able to use the walker to get to the bathroom –but his grown grandchildren, trying to help, got marching orders to leave him alone. I wonder if they are even thinking of leaving her alone with the old man. I worry. I tell her to make sure she sleeps with a knife under her pillow and call 911 if she needs help. He is still so strong and violent when he is not in control of himself and the world. She says she knows he hates her and maybe never EVER Loved her. I tell her NO –he did Love you –but he is tripping and sick.

I wonder how this will all end.

 So many grandchildren and great grandchildren the three sons have given the family. Does anyone just hold her? Is this what a lifetime of love mixed with abuse looks like? She cant remember the good times anymore. She just want to take her Prozac and tune him out. I want to rescue her , but she will not leave him. For better or worse ; In sickness or in Health. 

Their generation really take those words to heart.

Because in his good days –ah his good days –He is deserving of Wanda’s Grace and God’s Love.......... and .......I guess, mine too.

My Bucket List and Random Life: Christmas 2009 and the Missing Ring

My Bucket List and Random Life: Christmas 2009 and the Missing Ring

Christmas 2009 and the Missing Ring

I had a wonderful Christmas with the family. Didnt make Church with my brother -I am bummed about that -but I will make it soon -just wanted to hear the Christmas Carole's. We spent Christmas day with the family at my brothers home -and My sister in law cooked a wonderful dinner for her family and ours . It is a nice blend of people. After sinner we all sing Christmas Songs and take the annual picture. My niece from Texas was in for the Holiday -her boy friend couldn't come due to work but her cousin's boyfriend came for the first year. We like him.

The following day we had our family over for the gift exchange. This year mother and I made a turkey ahead of time and served cold Turkey sandwiches. I also had hot gravy if anyone wanted hot turkey sandwiches. Dad and I cut up apples and grapes and raisins with walnuts and fat free Mayo -for a delicous Waldorf salad. It was perfect. But no pictures that night.

Over the holidays I got to visit with a friend for Penn State that lives in the area. We went to lunch at Quotations in Media Pa. I really liked it and I like Media. I think when I sell my house in
a few years and move back to PA, I will try for an apartment over one of the stores in Media. I wonder if the trolleys still run ? The tracks are still there and the Train still runs into Philly with connecting access to almost anywhere.

I also got to have a cup of tea with a HS friend and her husband and talk about everything and nothing. I miss my old friends -alot still live in the area.

I just got home to my house and when I called to tell my parents I was home -My Mother greeted me with "I found my wedding ring". She lost it about three months ago -right before they flew to Florida -if fact almost missed the plane searing for it in their home. NOW -while emptying the trash can -she heard something in the bottom of the can -when she pulled up the little bag can liner - THERE IT WAS. YEA -she was so upset and now she is very Happy.


Thank you God and St Anthony and everyone that made this another wonderful Christmas!


Pics:
1/3/ Rachel (22) and Heather(24) Christmas pictures

2/ Family Picture 2009 -

FR- Robin S (me) Parents Tom n Jerry S/ Mary and Joe C (karen's parents)/

BR- Deb n Barry M (my sister) Rachel S/ Craig n Jesse T (karens niece)/ Karen and Tom (brother and sister in law) Heather/ Tyler T (karens nephew) Denise n Don T (karens sister)

A Cheap Posting of my Christmas letter 2009

Merry Christmas 2009 and Happy New Year 2010 To Everyone :))))

This year has gone by so quickly –I have been retired 2 ½ years now and it seems like yesterday. I still am able to meet up with friends for lunch and occasional dinner out as often as the budget allows. I try to make the early matinee at the local movie theater –which only charges $5.00 for that show. Getting little things done around the house as I have the money –by a neighbor that is doing odd jobs. It works out well for me. I am doing ok –last stress test went very well –It has now been a year (Nov 2008) since my last 3 heart stents were added to the 4 from the heart attack visit. Knock on wood. Still belly dancing at my gym. Had my required colonoscopy and endoscopy –(friend Annie helped me out) and all is well. It was not a fun time. Still clearing out my house of stuff –yes it is going slow –and yes I am trying to clean as I go –smile. Not writing as much as I would like but blogging and of course Face Book and a book group at the CM county Library. I am forcing myself to read ‘good’ books –I dislike more than I like. But Mother is also reading them with me and that is nice.

My 40^th H.S. (Sun Valley) was a blast in August. I was feeling fine and danced (yes oldfriends were SHOCKED) all night long. Carol Cross-Todd and I went together (her husband declined to go this time) shared a room and had a blast kissing and hugging everyone and trying to remember all the OLD people. I can NOT be this old. Marian Sell-Lord kept dancing past and asking me who was I? And what did I do with Robin, who never dances? LOL Thank you Belly Dancing and Angelina!

Went on some day trips to Ellis Island and NYC ground zero and Hudson River Fall Foliage boat. Two trips. My niece Rachel went with me on the Ellis Island trip and I met up with Rach and her mother Karen for the second trip. I think we all had a nice ime.

Rachel graduated from Delaware Valley College in June and was able to fine a job with Cigna Insurance Co. (business major). She is also doing critical care pet sitting (diabetic shots /pills etc) and working at the Pet groomers.

Heather and her partner (I don’t know what to call him –he aint no boy and man-friend sounds to casual) anyway Heather and Ryan bought a house!!! in Magnolia, TX. It looks beautiful from the pics –I still haven’t seen it. Soon!

Tom and Karen are well. Tom will be Master of his Masonic Lodge in 2010 and is hoping to see Heather’s house soon. Yea, She will be home for CHRISTMAS- xoxoxoxo.

Mother and Dad are home from FL for the month. We lost her older brother, Jack Hampton, in the spring. It was sad but we celebrated his life.

Diane, Uncle Jack’s wife, is very ill and dying. I think she cant wait to dance with him again in Heaven. They were/are so strong in their faith.

My first girl cousins are getting together at every possible opportunity. They are all such strong and wonderful women. I am so blessed.

Deb and Barry went to Argentina to see his daughter, Kate and for Deb to meet Kate’s partner, Daniel for the first time. The trip was to short but they all had a good time. Barry was able to get to FL a couple of times in 2009 and help my parents with the house down there. Thank-you, Barry.

The best news is my dear little friend Kylie (who came for visits when my good friend, her mother Patty, lived with me for a short while) is now all grown and a MOM.

Oliver Timothy Listwan-Bush was born in October and I got to hold him when he was a week old.

sweet .

God Bless Y’all /love robin

We are not amused.

I am e-mailing my Sister to ask if she can drive the 2 hours down to my house.

" Can you come down after work on Nov xx? and stay over Friday the xxth? Bring ur keys. I have been researching -Colonoscopy-Endoscopy for a Diabetic/Hypertensive/Heart Attack survivor with 7 stents; and I am finding nothing on point -but lots of people say -you wll be out of it that day and maybe the next -so????? could you come down? i am not asking you to take off Thurs the xxth -I supposedly have arranged transportation . The Hospital will pick me up and return me to my house, on the xxth Thurs -so that is covered.

Oh YES I am freaking out

No popcorn 2 weeks be 4 (that means HALLOWEEEN :(((( )-I have to buy lots of clear liquid drinks --NO dark red or Purple -and it has to be w sugar -since I will not have any.

No Plavix or asprin 7 days before (sO THAT MEANS THE xTH OF NOV !!!!)

Something about diuretics and the RX prep pills -so i need to call the DR. AGAIN

Oh if they werent sure what sedative to give me =they will be after my first hundred calls

Just light foods after the xth -can i be in this house and not eat for 2 days? Plain noodles/chicken/turkey/ WHITE BREAD/ fat free stuff is ok / but no milk?in my tea? and i am craving lettuce -

I am a little stressed -they should offer Valium before the test.

Like a month before?"

If I dont make it -I am an organ donor and tell the med student that I still have my appendix -How cool is that in a 58 year old woman? -It should make up for the missing womb. :0

The only part I am looking forward to is...........the part that comes out after the procedure is finished and the body expels all that compressed air - Flatulence without smell -what a HOOT -I hope I remember that!

Attitude is everything -oh and a bathroom to yourself.

Helen Rothenberger Hampton's Granddaughters

I spent this weekend with my girl cousins.

see Photo ; Deb (my sister) Laura (in red) Connie (Laura's sister) Toni (in brown). Kelly (Toni's sister) and me


My Mothers' parents had four children. Two boys and two girls. 11 grandchildren -six of which are girls -and each girl has a sister. Our cousin Connie lives on the West Coast -but she is here helping with her dying mother, my mother's sister in law.

It is very sad but she is strong in her faith and has accepted her time here is short. My Uncle died this past Spring and I know he is waiting to dance with her again -like most couples of that generation. they loved to dance. At the party for their 50th wedding anniversary -I cried when they danced to their favorite song. So when we decided to have a girl cousin get together with Connie -we went to see Aunt Diane also.

It was a Kleenex weekend.

At one point we all gathered in her bedroom, on the bed and in chairs pulled in and she told us about how Uncle Jack asked her to marry him and meeting Our grandparents for the first time. We laughed with her and then left, when it was time for her nap. Later that day we went thru family reunion pictures , I had brought with me. I know we exhausted her, but she was so gracious to us.

Connie and Laura. arranged for a friend to come to the house and visit , while we all went out for a girl cousin dinner (Aunt Jerry, our mother, gave my sister, Deb and I money for the trip so we used it to treat all of us to dinner -with love from Aunt Jerry -it was a lovely surprise).

Then we all went back to Aunt Dianes home -where Connie is staying -and visited and laughed and mostly cried. Kelly and Toni lost their parents first and are a wonderful source of support , both practical and emotional. Deb and I can offer love and support anyway way needed. These women -all younger than I -are so courageous. they humble me. I am so proud of them and to be part of our family. My NaNa, would like her granddaughters, we are good, strong women.

I dont know what Deb thinks -but I am overwhelmed with the thoughts of my parents entering this stage in their life. When I came home I tried to talk about it -but they both changed the subject. I dont even know where the will is or who the lawyer is !

All of my Aunts and Uncles prepared their children for all the details and Uncle Dick even had his funeral home picked and had Thank you cards printed , to be sent after he died -It was a picture of an outhouse on the front and on the inside it said "When you Gotta Go -YOU Gotta GO !" ; he even signed mine! Jeeze..... I burst out laughing -my sister in law was very upset and cried.

Today my parents left to Fly down to Florida for the season -they will be back for Christmas -then fly back. But my Mother lost her wedding ring, She has lost weight and apparently it slipped off. She noticed it when she was putting cold cream on her hands but doesnt know when or where she lost it. SHE WAS VERY UPSET. A 59 year old , original gold band -she never wanted replaced. I hope St Anthony will help me find it while they are gone.

Life is funny.

One woman is saying goodbye , her wedding band still on her finger for however long God grants her life and then, in death, to dance with her husband again.

The other woman ,so very upset, knowing that unless she finds her missing ring, for the rest of her life she will miss that band of gold, from a man she can still hold.


I love them ALL..