Wednesday, January 31, 2018

creative writing assignment Crime story/Yoga/Purple Bubble Gum and Funny

White Heels After Labor Day by rl simpson 2/1/2018

I didn't mean to kill him, it sort of just happened.

He loved to wear all my silky robes and nightgowns and apparently my yoga pants. We wear the same size in everything except gloves, he has small hands. I really had no problems with the robes and nightgowns, Yoga pants without underwear? Ok, well maybe a little problem. I just liked him to first ask to borrow my things.

He wore the pants to our, all male, YOGA class that night. I was behind him and well gross. Then I saw it -stuck =between his legs -all purple and glob-ie. Five pieces of chewed purple bubble gum -stuck to MY yoga Pants. I closed my eyes, searched for calm and rolled into a downward dog. Purple gum on MY yoga pants?-They were ruined.

After class, we all gathered our stuff and put on our outside shoes. It was almost a month after Labor Day and the weather was getting chilly. That was when I looked down at his feet and saw them. He also apparently had taken to wearing my heels. Tonight, he was wearing my favourite white summer heels. Without asking first.
'You can not ride home in the car with gum stuck to your fanny.'  I said from behind the steering wheel.
He bent over and stuck his head between his legs. and yelled through the open door.: 'Don't worry I will sit on the yoga mat."

I swear the car just shifted into gear and the open door hit him on the back and knocked him under the rear wheel and squashed his head.

I told the Judge I felt bad, but it was an accident. The only crime here was his. Imagine wearing white heels after Labor Day.

I got life and it was worth it.

 312 words