Sunday, November 27, 2016

Wrapped in tissue paper and nestled in my Mother bureau drawer, I found a beautiful Christmas scarf with tags still on. My Mother had not been out to shop in over two years before she died in March. It may have been a gift from a friend and yet, I claimed it as my own. An early Christmas present from my Mom, I will wear it and think of her. Miss you.

Wednesday, November 2, 2016

2016 My parents died 20 weeks apart. I am the executor. It has not been pleasant.

Executor                                                                                                    by rl simpson 11/3/2016

My sister is in FL now -taking what she wants before our parent's double-wide vacation house is sold. We are leaving things we do not want; it is how they do it down there. Our brother and sister and I, can not afford to keep it as a vacation place or ship the stuff back only to get rid of it here.  My sister insisted on her time. 
My brother and I had gone down earlier in the month to shred papers, throw away underwear from the drawers and donate all our parent's clothes. We sold the old car, they left in Florida, put the house up for sale, noticed the floor needed to be replaced and got some estimates. I decided not to spend any more money on a vacation home we could not keep. I put up FOR SALE BY OWNER signs in the park and got one inquiry but no offer. So after ten days, I listed the house with the over 55 park management company. 
My sister insisted on the extra time and to be allowed to travel down at the end of the month to cull what she wanted, from the house.  Believing the advice of the listing agent, that the house would never sell at that higher price, I agreed to lower it from the initial amount asked when we were selling it ourselves. The estate would pay the ridiculous ground rent fee until it sold. Two days after I left to come home, the very low offers starting coming in.  All day long, I turned each of the offers down. By day's end, we got the full listing price offer. I later realised the price was very low. It sold in that week. The management company kept a commission, and we listed it 'as is'.
The potential buyer asked that we settle the following week. I said no, my sister had to get her things. They were aware of that time frame; it was part of the listing agreement. The sales agent said the buyer would walk. I said fine. At this point, I was so annoyed I wanted to tear up the listing agreement and raise the price. But my brother said no, wait a week. I did, and the buyer signed. We also did.
My sister was not happy; she felt we should put the $20,000.00 it would cost to fix, into it and sell it to her for a dollar or rent out the property for the high season. She could not afford the monthly ground rent and the high season rent would not cover all twelve months ground rent. My brother was not happy that she insisted on going down, costing the estate a month of ground rent we did not need to pay and did not come with us to clean out the house. I was upset the listing agent mislead me. But it was sold, and we never have to worry about hurricanes and pest control and nagging homeowner association maintenance letters, again. 
Then, the agent gave the buyer a key to go into the house, alone. I had my spies in place, and they called and told me. I had the sales acceptance ready to fax when we found this out. When the sales agent called to ask why the forms had not been sent, I handed the phone to my angry sister -who had been working herself up to murderize me and hire her own lawyer. The buyer has not trespassed since.
Our sister and her husband drove down to gather the things they wanted and left at the house from the twice a year they visited. My brother in law had purchased a rocking chair from an elderly resident, who had bought it from a chain restaurant. He had planned to take it apart and transport it home to Pennsylvania. My brother, a knowledgeable woodworker, saw it was glued and suggested our brother in law bring a rubber mallot to knock it apart, but doubted if it would ever be the same when putting back together. The decision was made to give it to the next door neighbor. My spy, ah I mean neighbor, assured us my brother in law could visit and sit in the chair whenever he was in Ft Myers.
It was only ever a vacation house, filled with leftovers and thrift store finds, duplicate clothes and an accepted risk of being destroyed by a hurricane or severe weather. But still...   My Mother brought some old pink towels down from when her brothers and sister, broke up their family home; in the 1970's  -I remember her Mother, our NaNa, drying us on those dusty rose color towels. After all these years -they still looked good. It was hard to say goodbye, but they were the scratchiest towels -then and now. Only in NaNa's hands did they seem like love.
  We now have the Pennsylvania house to clean out and sell. My sister lived there most of her life, but when she married 11 years ago, she moved into his condo and never had the room to move any of her things. My parents allowed her to use their house as a giant storage locker.
Our sister claims all the things inside are hers because Mother incorporated them into her home. I remember my Mother being stressed because my sister would never get rid of anything,  She kept it all at their house. Downsizing was not an option for my parents, my sister's things held them captive.
My brother and I have agreed, she can have anything she wants, just remove them from the house. So I drive two hours every other week to Pennsylvania to handle estate business. My brother is handling the house maintenance and going thru generic things to discard. My sister has rented a storage unit, that will bankrupt her. We can not call an appraiser in until her things are removed. She is working on that. She had told me before she left for Florida, it may take her ten years to settle this, and if she gets through this ordeal without killing someone, we will be lucky.